(A story about murder, miracles, and rising again.)
—Ever since I’ve been very young, I’ve pondered deeply about the meaning of life. I used close my eyes at night and wonder- “What happens when we die?” (I was only 6 year old..)
I feel too much. Keep too much. Obsess too much.
Perhaps, this is the reason I fell into the abyss after my sister’s murder, went insane, lost control, wrote never-ending sentences. (Words Save)
Are other people like this? Do other people experience this madness when they lose their best friends, their soul mates, part of their childhood?
Or only writers? Or only people who can’t let go? Or only sisters? Or only fools?
Does every thing in our lives happen for a reason?
I believe Kay knew he was going to kill her. (although, she never told me this) But I believe we all have a sixth sense, that thing we don’t utilize, that gift of prophesy given to us freely when we’re born.
“Kim,” she told me a week before he killed her. “On my walk today – I told God ‘if I see a orange butterfly and an eagle—this will tell me every thing is going to be okay.’
“Really?” I said.
“Yes,” she said. “And I saw both of them.”
But it wasn’t okay. It was far from okay. Will it ever be okay?
At the hospital, I remember screaming—“Orange butterfly? Eagle?”
More lies. More deception. More bullshit.
You may already know I have Kay’s journals. One of the last entries says, “Show Me A Miracle, God.”
I must be totally honest– I was angry at God for 3 strait years for promises He never kept.
“You call this a miracle? I call is BS!” ( Yeah, I talk to Him like that. He can take it. He knows me. Really knows me.)
“Things happen for a reason.”
I used to HATE, Despise, & be Offended by this stupid cliché.”
But I need to tell you something—
It’s not God’s fault Kay is dead.
It’s the fault of the murderer. Only him. He decided to pull the trigger three times (just to make sure she didn’t get back up)
Yes. God could’ve stopped it. He couldn’t stopped him from pulling the trigger.
One. Two. Three times.
But He didn’t.
Her deliverance was not to be on earth.
She is now surrounded by a million orange butterflies, majestic eagles perched on clouds, and a God that set her free.
And she rises every single day.
Through everybody she left behind.
THIS. Yes, this.
This may be the miracle.
———–This is Kay’s story, but it doesn’t need to be YOUR STORY.
If you are in an abusive situation, make plans to leave.
Listen to your 6th Sense!
Your story can be different beginning today.
~~~~~~~~24/7 National U.S. Hotlines~~~~~~~~~~~~
Safe Haven in Duluth: 1 218 623 1000
CASDA in Wisconsin: 1 800 649 2921
Teen Dating Abuse Helpline: 1-866-331-9474
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Trevor Lifeline (for LGBTQ* youth): 1-866-488-7386
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
National Runaway Safeline: 1-800-786-2929
National Domestic Violence Hotline – 1-800-799-7233
National Hotline for Crime Victims: 1-855-484-2846
National Street Harassment Hotline: 1-855-897-5910
You. Are. Not. Alone.
You. Are. Loved.
You. Are. Rising
–~~~A Last NOTE: DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT say, “Things happen for a reason” to anybody who loses a loved one. They need to figure it out for themselves. Thank you.