Mr. Liverpool’s First Love. Damn Him.
“You don’t know JACK POOP about me, do you?”
“Huh?”
Mr. L. looks at me dumbfounded. He’s had this identical look on his face numerous times in our marriage. That look of D U H.
I had just finished watching a television show where couples were asked questions such as: what’s your wife’s favorite color, food, book, movie, destination? Stuff like that.
Most of the couples had only been married under a year, and they were already answering quickly and confidently. One dude said, “She likes blue. Not a deep, royal blue, but more like a soft, aqua blue.” Another retorted, “Her preferred foods are curry marinated chicken wings with Kraft blue cheese dressing on the side.
WTF? Such delicious details. ( to be honest, I was a bit jealous )
This got me to thinking. What does Mr. L. truly know about me after 25 years of marriage?
Would he know my favorite movie is Spartacus, my favorite series is Sex and the City, and my favorite destination is Kenya? Would he even know something as uncomplicated as what my favorite color is?
“What I’m trying saaaaaaay is you may think you know me, but you don’t know JACK POOP.”
“What are you talking about now, Kim?”
“What I’m saaaaaaaaying is, you don’t actually know the “r e a l” me.
The little things, the things you may believe are insignificant, but they’re not. Do you?
Did you know I like liver-sausage on saltine crackers after my walks? Did you know I’ve read Jonathan Livingston Seagull five times, & that I met Anne Frank in my dreams? ”
Yeah, it’s all true.
“Shit, will you please let me watch the rest of this soccer game?”
“Nope. Absolutely, positively not.”
“What do you want from me?”
“I want you to tell me what my favorite movie is.”
“Come on, really?
“Yeah, if you know me so well, what’s my favorite movie. Don’t you feel you should know this after all these years?”
“Um, it’s either The Breakfast Club, The American President, or what’s that one called with Cher and Sam Elliott you’ve watched about a million times with the bikers and that kid with the mask?
“Wrong. Wrong. And f*cking WRONG again.”
He continues watching Liverpool against Manchester. Apparently, the stupid game is more important than this conversation.
“Stop staring at me,” he finally says.
“Ok, what country would I most want to visit? I mean, I want to fly there immediately.”
He turns to look at me. ‘That’s simple. England.”
“Noooooo! I’ve been there before. Don’t you evvvvver listen to me?”
“Stop whining.”
I stand in front of the television and consider performing a bit of Magic Mike to get his full attention.
Hell, No! He doesn’t deserve that until he can answer at least one of my questions.
“I’m going to miss that penalty kick if you continual standing there!” He shouts. “Move!”
“I’m not moving until you can tell me what my favorite color is.”
“Don’t you smell something burning in the kitchen?”
“Tell me NOW now now now?”
He smiles.
“I know that one.”
“What is it?”
“Well, you buy lots of black boots.”
I move away from the television, kiss him firmly on the lips.
“Your answer pleases me. You shall live another day.”
“I pass?”
“For now,” I answer.
——–Darling, Reader, do you ever have conversations like these w/ your partner? If so, your partner know those little, sweet things about you?
—I’m Glad to be back. I’ve missed you all terribly. How Are YOU? xxx
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77 Comments
Brenda Florestano
August 29, 2015 at 9:09 amI know why the newlyweds got the color question right. They have recently spent a year planning a pinterest wedding and have spent hours with the beloved comparing fabric swatches. Mr. Liverpool knows you enough to indulge you, to make you laugh, and to provide the arms you want to keep coming back to. If there are things about you he doesn’t know, that’s just fine. What fun would it be to live with someone who has no mystery? Plus, I know for me, the favorite movie and/or book keeps changing. Who can keep up?
My Inner Chick
August 30, 2015 at 5:09 pmI agree.
it was fun teasing him about this!! xx
lisa thomson
August 29, 2015 at 9:58 amHaaaa! Yes indeed and my guy also doesn’t like these questions. He has been known to say “What do you want from me?” a time or two but that makes me f-u-r-i-o-u-s. I guess it’s a guy thing. Perhaps they find us such a mystery, they have to ask what we want?
Your favorite color is pink, no? Favorite movie Moonstruck!
Cuz that’s what friends are for…they get us when the guys are all like ” What…?!”
Missed you, Kim! Hope you had a nice blog break. xo
My Inner Chick
August 30, 2015 at 5:09 pmI’ve missed you, too!
How r U? xxx
My Inner Chick
August 29, 2015 at 11:09 amIS This Working????
Chris Carter
August 29, 2015 at 12:29 pmHa!! I can picture this scene so full of hilarious detail!! I love how you and Mr. L go back and forth! I won’t even GO. THERE. with my hubs… because even though he may not even remember much of anything about those questions, he knows exactly what I need *MOST of the time* on any particular day… Not colors, movies, or foods really- because marriage in it’s most profound existence is about SO much more.
On those really hard days… is when he knows exactly what he needs to know. He gets me- in the deepest and darkest and most passionate places.
That’s all we really need in a husband, right? 🙂
My Inner Chick
August 30, 2015 at 5:11 pmDear, Chris,
We’ve been together all these years because we
agree on the IMPORTANT things: God, Kids, Morals, Integrity, Stuff like that..
but sometimes the man drives me NUTSSSSSS. xxx
nan @ lbddiaries
August 29, 2015 at 12:32 pmHe knows some things; others change so much he’d have no clue. And YES we have strange and fascinating conversations like this all the time. I finally figured out one day that it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t know my favorite movie – it matters that he comes home to me faithfully every day, he would die for me and he loves me madly, passionately and completely… without knowing my fave movie! I don’t even know my fave movie since I actually have more than one and would be hard-pressed to pick just one!!
My Inner Chick
August 30, 2015 at 5:13 pmNan,
Mr. L. and I have many different interests.
For example, I love movie stars, movies, THE ROYAL FAM!
he DOES NOT.
that’s okay!
xxx LOVE
Balroop Singh
August 29, 2015 at 1:08 pmHa ha!! Lovely topic Kim! That is so common! all men have that trait… I am sure my husband too loves cricket more than me but that is only when he is watching it and I am trying to stand in front of him to ask those damn questions he hates!!
But I am quite used to that. I have stopped asking questions now because I know him better than he knows me!
My Inner Chick
August 30, 2015 at 5:13 pmHaaaaa.
that’s why God invented girlfriends, right? xx
Elephant's Child
August 29, 2015 at 1:23 pmI am pretty certain that my partner would fail on all of those questions.
Mind you, he does know which things warm my heart, and which things tear it apart.
And I will settle (happily) for that.
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:45 amSue,
Mr. L. knows the important things.
For example, that I’m CRAZY!! xx
Monica
August 29, 2015 at 3:45 pmMr. Liverpool sounds like the most amazing guy and after 25 years, your best friend. He’s a good guy and you’re lucky to have each other. Good for you, Kim!
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:45 amHe’s the first and the last, darling! xx
Shay from Trashy Blog
August 29, 2015 at 4:18 pm“Stop staring at me.” That made me laugh out loud. I could picture it!
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:45 amYep,
I’ll stare that mother down until he breaks! xx
Carrie Rubin
August 29, 2015 at 4:40 pmHa, this is wonderful. You’ve got me wanting to ask my husband these questions. I think we’ll have to make a game of it. See who gets the most right. 🙂
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:46 amTell me how many he gets right, Carrie! xx
Ronda Erie
August 29, 2015 at 8:13 pmI laughed out loud! I read it aloud to Robb so he could laugh with me ❤
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:46 amHaaaa.
glad I could make you guys laugh.
I MISS UUUU. Looking forward to hugging you on Wed. xx
Derek B
August 29, 2015 at 8:47 pmYour article is further proof of the integral difference of DNA between the femme and male of the species.
Exit stage left
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:47 amExcellent response, Derek B!!!!
Angie@Angie's Recipes
August 29, 2015 at 11:17 pm:-)))) You have made my day, Kim. My husband doesn’t even know what my favourite colour is though we do like to watch football together.
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:48 amAngie,
I like women’s soccer!
The other, not as much! xx
Gary Sidley
August 30, 2015 at 5:24 amAs the great Bill Shankly once said: ‘Football is not a matter of life and death; it’s much more important than that!’
And I’m now off to test my wife on how much she really knows about me.
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:49 amJust told Mr. L. what you said.
Shankly is his idle.
He has a poster in his office of him as if he’s a rock star! xx
Debbie D.
August 30, 2015 at 6:40 amMessing with a guy when he’s watching soccer?! Mr. Liverpool must really love you to put up with that! 😉 Congratulations on 25 years of wedded bliss, Kim.
For fun, I asked my Italian, soccer fanatic hubby these questions, but not during a game and he got them right. Well, after 42 years, one would hope so, yes? 😀
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:49 am42 Years! FABULOUS &
RARE! xx Congrats.
Jodi
August 30, 2015 at 8:39 amCute!
Just asked Ted: “What’s my favorite color?”
Without skipping a beat: “Purple.”
Good boy.
I’ve been well and busy and happy! xoxoxo
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:50 amJodi,
I’ve missed communicating w/ you.
Are you well?!!! xxx
Debbie
August 30, 2015 at 11:33 amAh, Kim, I’ve MISSED you! It’s such a treat having you back, dear! As for Mr. L., why, no he might not know all those teensy details, but he’s there, beside you, and has been for 25 years. What a blessing you’ve been to each other! In his defense, men are pretty clueless how important stuff like this is to women. They think if they told us one time that they loved us, that would be sufficient forever. It’s not, of course! Perhaps that’s why it’s up to women to handle details while the guys concentrate on the “big picture.” And hey, soccer isn’t so bad — at least he got the black boots part right, huh?? Hugs from HOT Central Illinois.
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:50 amDebbie,
it’s hot in MN, too, and I love it!
How far are you from Chicago?
xxx
Valentine Logar
August 30, 2015 at 12:29 pmThis reminds me of the shoe game played at some strange weddings I have attended over the years. Your Mr. is a lovely man Kim. Not knowing some of these details, well who among us knows the details that change over the years?
XXX <3 XXX
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:51 amI agree, Darling.
This is the reason GOD created girlfriends! xxx
Lisa Gordon
August 30, 2015 at 2:09 pmSo glad you are back, Kim!
I have missed you.
What a great post, and now you’ve got me wondering. If I get off this couch right now, could ruin the end of the golf match!!! 🙂
You have a great week, sweet friend. xo.
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:52 amHaaaa.
Do it!
How are you, Lisa? xx
My Inner Chick
August 30, 2015 at 2:12 pmTESTING.
One. Two. DAMN YOU.
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 12:17 pmAgain….
Jann
August 30, 2015 at 2:18 pmLove love love this, Kim! You gave me a good chuckle. Your guy is British–of course soccer is his first love!!! Didn’t he tell you that was part of the British package when he proposed? xxxxxx
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:52 amJann,
I was Pre-Warned.
Soccer FIRST.
Then, MEEEEEE. xx how are you, sweets?
solidgoldcreativity
August 30, 2015 at 5:04 pmHaha,“Your answer pleases me. You shall live another day.” So queenly, just as I imagine you! xxx
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:53 amI. Am. The. Queen.
Haaa.
I need to keep telling myself this! xxx
Hotly Spiced
August 30, 2015 at 8:08 pmSometimes I’m really surprised at how the little things about me that I think are so glaringly obvious go completely unnoticed. I’m glad he’s noticed you have a lot of black boots xx
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:54 amCharlie,
men are oblivious to the little things, right?
thank goodness he cares about the BIG things! xx
Kim Gagnon
August 30, 2015 at 8:54 pmLove you Kimmers!!!!!! Xoxo
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:54 amLove you, too, KIMMY. xxxxx
Mandy
August 31, 2015 at 12:33 amI definitely know more about my Pete than he knows about me, well I think so. I am going to put it to the test!
Missed you and think of you every day – amazing how you make your way into my thoughts – lovely!
Have a beautiful and happy week hon.
🙂 Mandy xoxoxo
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:55 amMandy,
OOOO, you are such a sweetheart!
I love reading your letters and blogs about your life.
One day we shall drink wine together and discuss world events, life, death, and CATS! xxx
marie
August 31, 2015 at 1:25 amYou made me laugh, it’s so good!
OK I would not have tried this with my ex or I would have finished the evening in tears in the bedroom with him shouting how stupid I am. Anyway he would not have been able to answer any of these questions. He was too preoccupied by his life all the time that he did not have space to think about mine.
Anyway…
I think most guys don’t get attached to those little things that mean the world to us. We know things by heart. They have to be reminded of them. But in the mess of life, if they are standing there with us, hand in hand, we know it does not matter much…It’s just fun after all Kim. And it’s good this way.
Much Love. Happy to have you back. Missed you!
xoxoxoxoxo
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 7:57 amMarie,
I’ve missed you, too.
I look forward to reading your posts…
seeing how far you’ve come. xxxxxxx
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 9:14 amMy Inner chick
Claire
August 31, 2015 at 8:07 amI’m horrible at remembering details like that about people – I could barely tell you any of my friends’ birthdays and for sure don’t know any of their favourite colours, but I can tell they’re upset from the wording of a text, which I (hope!!) is what really matters!
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 9:14 amHaaa.
One must be very careful about texting nowadays. I have stories about that! xx
Minnesota Prairie Roots
August 31, 2015 at 11:46 amI read this and laughed. Laughed because just this weekend I stood in front of the TV to get the husband’s attention. He was watching a football game, I believe. And then when he was staring at me last evening, I asked why. “Can’t I look at my lovely wife?” he asked.
Ah, there, all is good. We have been married 33 years and God how I love that man.
I’ve missed you, Kim. Welcome back from wherever and whatever.
My Inner Chick
August 31, 2015 at 12:21 pmI love that you LOVE that man.
How refreshing after so many years.
I, too, love Mr. L, although he drives me INSANE)) xx
Dad
August 31, 2015 at 5:25 pmKim, I have married a lot longer than you, and I still don’t Moms favorite color.
Or her fav movie or song, food, and lots more. We don’t have a lot in common,
but we still love each other.
Love You
Dad
My Inner Chick
September 1, 2015 at 8:49 amDaddy,
I just love you sooooooooooooooooooooooo much. xxxxxxx
Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella
September 1, 2015 at 1:42 amLOL we ALWAYS have conversations like this Kim! It’s so funny really. And I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know half of the answers to these questions. I might test him just to see! 😉
My Inner Chick
September 1, 2015 at 8:50 amLet me know if he passes, Lorraine! xx
Deborah Batterman
September 1, 2015 at 12:04 pmIronic to be reading ‘The Post-Birthday World’ by Lionel Shriver, which deals with a woman’s infatuation with a British snooker star (okay, a far cry from soccer) that has her questioning a long-standing relationship she’s in. Very interesting construction– alternating chapters that become a kind of dual narrative exploring different outcomes. All of which is to say, it does get a woman thinking — albeit with a touch less charm than your post.
My Inner Chick
September 4, 2015 at 8:01 amAs always, Deborah,
I appreciate your comments! xx
Jeri
September 1, 2015 at 1:35 pmOh some good belly laughs here. Thanks for sharing this and welcome back to blog-land. All of your pics of San Fran looked great and make me want to get back there someday, preferably sooner than later. Considering my partner is gone, gone, gone… all I can say is I thought I knew him and didn’t know him. At all.
My Inner Chick
September 4, 2015 at 8:01 amJeri,
I’m sorry, darling.
Is that the cute guy you hike with?
xxxx
Sandra
September 2, 2015 at 12:55 amConsider yourself lucky! My husband likes every sport more than he likes me! Gah!
My Inner Chick
September 4, 2015 at 8:02 amSandra,
Mine TOOOO.
Lets meet for wine! xx
Coffee and Crumpets
September 2, 2015 at 8:14 amHa! Sounds like our conversations but thats being generous calling it a conversations because we don’t have those either!! After 19 years together :/
Just replace the British footie with American football.
I think if we asked this question in our first year we may have been to answer it like those couples on the show.
Time makes us so comfortable with each other, questions like that are no longer necessary. Though, I share so many likes with him, like Sci Fi and sports that he gets away easy 🙂
My Inner Chick
September 4, 2015 at 8:02 amThis is true.
But in my next life, I shall become a Soccer Ball!! xx
Dawn in MI
September 3, 2015 at 2:14 pmhahahahahahahaha. We too have been married 25 years (next week). And I’m positive he doesn’t know my favorite color or my favorite movie because I don’t thin I HAVE a favorite of either of those. We’ve never played this game…and if we did I would probably fail miserably as well. Still…25 years later we know enough to know we’ll still be together 25 years from now if we’re lucky enough to still be around anywhere.
My Inner Chick
September 4, 2015 at 8:03 amDawn,
happy 25th!! Sweetheart <3
Marcia @ Menopausal Mother
September 4, 2015 at 7:59 pmYou are adorable! But now I’m worried…..I need to go have this conversation with my husband IMMEDIATELY.
My Inner Chick
September 5, 2015 at 8:40 amTell me if he passes the test, Marcia! xx
Kristi Campbell
September 4, 2015 at 8:20 pmFirst, LIVER sausage? GROSS!!! But yes, I’ve had a thousand conversations like this one with my husband and he only recently got my favorite color right because our son asked. Gah. And LOL to the whole “really? we’re doing this now? And move!” because YES!!! HA.
Even tonight, mine was watching football and I was like “WHO IS THIS and WHY DO YOU CARE?” I guess he cares because whatever team will be maybe playing his team whenever.
My Inner Chick
September 5, 2015 at 8:41 amHAAaa.
I love love love liver sausage. Are you craaazy!? xx
ladyfi
September 4, 2015 at 10:35 pmHa ha – love it!
Sandra
September 10, 2015 at 3:37 pmMr. Sweets would probably get the favorite movie correct because I’ve watched it 9782 times. The other questions not so much.
Lady E
September 20, 2015 at 12:48 pmTehehe !
I can almost picture Mr Liverpool, poor man 😉