- Wear clean underwear.
“Kim Rae, if you’re ever in a fire or accident, God forbid, you’re going to wish you had clean, new underwear on.”
She would have flipped out if she knew I didn’t wear any. (stop judging, judgers)!
- Your toes will tingle when you find him.
You will know when you meet the right man. First, your toes will tingle, then the tingling will travel all the way to the top of you head.”
It was more like an electrical shock, Mommy!
- Don’t forget to say your prayers.
“Kimmy, did you say your prayers? Jesus hears you. Jesus loves you.”
She still says these words today. And I’m, um, a bit older.
By the way, sometimes I think Jesus is quite fed up with my whining and bitching.
- Kill them with kindness.
“If somebody is cranky and mean, just smile a beautiful smile.”
This is soooooooooo difficult, because I want to yell, “STOP being icky and ugly and ignorant, pleeeease!!”
- Have lots of dessert!
“Stop worrying about your weight and have some of my famous chocolate cake.”
My mommy makes chocolate cake from scratch with buttermilk, sweet butter, chocolate chips and coffee.
- Always remember to call your mother.
“Kimmy, don’t forget to call me before you go to bed.”
Every. Single. Night.
She asks a million questions: What did you make for dinner? How was school? What did the kids do today? Did they say anything funny? How’s the cat? Is Dave home from soccer? Did you write anything about Kay today?
- Talk to your plants.
“If you talk to your plants, they will purr and grow.”
I assume she talks to her plants exactly how she talked to us when we were babies….with an overabundance of love & tenderness.
- Buy high-quality sheets and pillow cases.
“Don’t buy the cheap stuff. You will be sorry.”
I get her hand-me-downs.
When we were young, she ironed all of our sheets, pillow cases and diapers! (She aint called Saint Shirley for nothin’)
- “Never go to bed angry. Tell people you love them.”
“What if somebody dies that night?
I’ve NEVER hung up the phone without saying, “I Love You.”
This is the last thing I said to Kay. And I tell everybody I love them often. Even the mailman.
- The early bird gets the worm.
“I have my treadmill, washing, dishwashing going, and ironing done by 5:00 AM.”
Never. In. A. Million. Years.
—–Darlings, did you call your mommy today? Do you tell people you love them enough?
Happy Mommy’s Day!! xxX