In Memory of Kay Kim's Blogs

All Roads Out Of Hell Lead Home

All Roads Out Of Hell Lead Home—Shannon L. Alder

The object of a new year is not that we should have a new year, but rather that we should have a new soul. –G.K.Chesterton





It’s no surprise that I’ve been quite insane the past few years.


I mean,  loony bin- Sylvia Plath insane, cry out to God- ridiculously insane, the kind of insane where you have one foot stuck on earth and the other foot stuck in triple hell.


If you haven’t experienced  this,  clearly,  you haven’t lost your soul-mate.


But I’m not writing these words  to whine or weep or try to make you feel bad for my sorry ass.


What I’m trying to articulate is even though I’ve been thru Hell,  I’ve come out the other side (sort of),  witnessed glimmers of light,  and felt the warm sun bleed upon my face.


I find this extraordinary, miraculous, astonishing.    Seriously.


You know,  that one can return “Home” after that kind of suffering and pain.


This is a post about what has thrilled, encouraged, and helped me move forward in 2014.


Sometimes we find joy in the most unexpected, beautiful  places.


Anyhow,   here are some of my favorite things of 2014….




****My mommy,  Saint Shirley,  found the recipe for our childhood fudge.  Biting into it was like biting into my beautiful, carefree childhood.


Sisto Childhood Fudge!

Sisto Childhood Fudge!



****My beloved book of 2014 was “WILD.”  I listened to the audio while walking on the railroad tracks near our house.  When I think of WILD,  I smell iron and lily of the valley and summer and new beginnings.


LOVE this book!

LOVE this book!



****Downton Abbey’s characters soaked into my bones and blood.   No other series compares to this delectable delight.  I’m addicted.



****I am madly & deeply in love with Ed Sheeran.   I’ve played this song over and over and over….  Thinking Out Loud




****These 2 blog posts EMPOWERED, delighted,  & caused me to smile:    I Wore a Bikini & Nothing Happened   &  The Hotness Scale




****I FINALLY received a RED purse from my sweet boys, whom I LOVE:  Andrew,  Alex, & Mr. Liverpool.   What a thrill.  (The Coach bag was a little extra somethin’


Yummy. YEsssssss.  I Love!

Yummy. YEsssssss. I Love!



****Cats make me reeeeeeeally happy.  God knew what HE was doing when he created the little assholes.






****A single red  rose,  which was lifeless,  blooms once again in my Mommy’s window in the middle of December.  (“I am He who lives, and was dead, and behold, I am alive forevermore)—Rev. 1:18






****These are the most read/popular blogs on  My Inner Chick in 2014.


She Stayed Becasue She Was Too Lazy To Leave

 13 Reasons She Stayed

 6 Early Signs of Domestic Abuse

21 Things I Learned From My Sister’s Murder

VideoSilent No More


****These posters from My Inner Chick Facebook Page were shared the most in 2014.









****I love my daddy sooooooooooooo much.  He hasn’t missed a blog post since 2010.  And he doesn’t judge me, you know,  if I say the “F” word.


My daddy was 17 years old when I was born. xx

My daddy was 17 years old when I was born. xx



****My favorite quote of 2014:   “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”—Rumi




****My favorite charity is Home For Life Facebook Page  Obama,  our neighborhood stray, is there walking on heated floors,  safe,  free, meowing, and purring loudly.


Obama Lives! -Photo sent by Home for Life!

Obama Lives! -Photo sent by Home for Life!



****Amazing Women Rock! is overflowing with substance,  depth,  and words that matter.


….So much more, but I must get ready to go out w/ Mr. L. for New Year’s Eve.  Perhaps he’ll take me to WILD!


——Darling,  readers,  I consider you my dear friends. It doesn’t matter a damn that we haven’t met face to face.  No!  We are still part of humanity & can make the world a better place.  Do you agree?  What are some of your highlights from 2014?  What “words to live by” can you add?


Happy 2015 with LOTS & Lots of love.   xxXX


“Set fire to the broken pieces; start anew.” ―Lauren DeStefano

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  • Reply
    Elephant's Child
    December 31, 2014 at 12:12 pm

    Love and laughter to your beautiful self. This year, and every year.
    Elephant’s Child recently posted..Sunday Selections #204My Profile

  • Reply
    Britton Swingler
    December 31, 2014 at 12:39 pm

    Kim – another post in which I am reminded of all the important things–the connections we make, the losses we grieve, and the indomitable human spirit that helps us keep pulling ourselves up by our fucking boot straps. I just love you. Happy New Year – and I do mean happy. I’m willing you lots and lots of smiles.
    Britton Swingler recently posted..Ellie’s ShoesMy Profile

  • Reply
    Joe Peterson
    December 31, 2014 at 1:48 pm

    Kim, you continue to inspire, to educate, and hopefully your message is instilling some bravery in the men and women that deserve a loving partner and a chance to blossom in life. ❤️

  • Reply
    December 31, 2014 at 2:07 pm

    Dear Kim – what a fab way to end 2014 – knowing that we got thru it and are still standing. And we had a good time in between the hours or days that throw us against the wall and remind us of our losses. So glad I am on this journey with you. xoxo here’s to an ass kicking 2015!
    elizabeth recently posted..September Mourn – September 11,2001My Profile

  • Reply
    Jennifer Wolfe (@mamawolfeto2)
    December 31, 2014 at 2:24 pm

    Kim, you helped make my 2014 much brighter! I love your comments on my blog, and your emotional and honest writing. And I love Wild and Ed, too! Here’s to 2015, and facing it with courage and love.
    Jennifer Wolfe (@mamawolfeto2) recently posted..A Year of Change and Possibilities: September, October, November & December 2014My Profile

  • Reply
    Hotly Spiced
    December 31, 2014 at 3:11 pm

    You have a very good-looking father! Amazing how he was just 17 when you were born – he certainly stepped up from being a teenager to being a man and a very good father. I love the look of your fudge and it reminds me of the fudge my mother used to make. Happy New Year to you, Kim and all your family xx
    Hotly Spiced recently posted..Boxing Day, 2014My Profile

  • Reply
    Barbara Hammond
    December 31, 2014 at 3:22 pm

    You are such an inspiration to so many, Kim. Love that. Love you. The Highlight of 2014 for us was definitely fulfilling our quest to find our forever home in Cape May! And, because we were able to make that happen, my words to live by would be…Never give up on a dream. Work your ass off to make it happen!
    Barbara Hammond recently posted..Celebrating a Great Year and Looking Forward!My Profile

  • Reply
    Susan boswell
    December 31, 2014 at 3:30 pm

    Dearest Kim
    You have been to hell and mostly back. I remember the day your life changed… You, Elizabeth, Charlene, Cheryl – yall were the big 3, make that 4 from Skirt! I was and am your biggest fans. Then your life changed and wow- I know you struggled to hang on to everyday. I am so proud of all you have done, bringing this site to reality, your walk for Kay and all the people you have reached out to and helped and no doubt saved. I’m so proud your passion has come back . I’m proud you chose life when I remember many days you wanted to join your sister. May 2015 be a fantastic year. Love you!
    Susan boswell recently posted..Packing Up, After ChristmasMy Profile

  • Reply
    lisa thomson-the great escape
    December 31, 2014 at 3:47 pm

    Wow, Kim it’s been quite a year for you and for us who enjoy My Inner Chick so much. Your images of Kay are powerful reminders that domestic violence is thriving still and awareness is more important than ever. I love that quote wounds are where the light gets in…so true. You’re an amazing inspiration, Kim! Thank you for all your support and comments at my blog this past year. I’m looking forward to our continued friendship in 2015.
    lisa thomson-the great escape recently posted..2015, The Year Of HappinessMy Profile

  • Reply
    December 31, 2014 at 3:49 pm

    I love you everyday of the year. NOW, I think I’m going to have some fudge. And love the purse! You rock! Xoxoxo
    Jodi recently posted..I miss you means I love youMy Profile

  • Reply
    December 31, 2014 at 4:01 pm

    Kim, this post made me so happy; there are tears in my eyes! The fact that you’re rediscovering joy in the world after such an insane tragedy–what a testament to the human spirit!!! You’ve honored your sister’s memory in so many beautiful ways & you’re a constant source of inspiration to us all. You truly deserve happiness and I hope 2015 brings you oodles & oodles of it. xxxxx
    Jann recently posted..Comment on Summer’s End by BellaMy Profile

    • Reply
      December 31, 2014 at 4:53 pm

      Fudge, purse, handsome Dad, saintly mother. Sunshine on your face and touching your soul. So proud of the work you have done…getting through hell involves planting one sexy boot in front of the other, and repeating. Blessed 2015 to you.

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      January 4, 2015 at 9:12 am

      I’ve miss you, dear. Are you well. Oodles of love sent from MN. xx
      My Inner Chick recently posted..All Roads Out Of Hell Lead HomeMy Profile

  • Reply
    December 31, 2014 at 4:46 pm

    Cheers to a happy New Year and you getting closer to the other side. Those posters on FB have strong impact. I hope they were shared and folk are listening.
    totsymae1011 recently posted..A Matter of Black and WhiteMy Profile

  • Reply
    December 31, 2014 at 4:55 pm

    Well, somehow that ended up as a reply and not a comment. The sentiment is the same…
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  • Reply
    Charlene Ross
    December 31, 2014 at 5:08 pm

    Funny, I’m just finishing up my 2014 post! (Which I think I stole from you last year!) 🙂

    A few of my highlights were celebrating my 20th wedding anniversary and watching my son’s XC team finish 2nd at the state championship.

    Love you so much, Kim! Have a most awesome New Year’s Eve and wishing you a HAPPY, prosperous 2015.
    Charlene Ross recently posted..My Grandfather’s Christmas Coffee CakeMy Profile

  • Reply
    December 31, 2014 at 5:54 pm

    Your favorite things of 2014 are all wonderful. As are you. Look at the good you did in 2014. 2015 will be even better. Happy New Year.

  • Reply
    Balroop Singh
    December 31, 2014 at 8:34 pm

    This is so powerful and uplifting Kim! ‘Coming back’ from hell is truly inspiring! I love you. One of the highlights of 2014 is that I found you. I love that cat! Stay blessed. I look forward to your continued efforts in helping those who are bleeding.
    Have a wonderful 2015!
    Balroop Singh recently posted..Learning To Control And Train Our EmotionsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Angie@Angie's Recipes
    December 31, 2014 at 9:01 pm

    wow Your father looks like a Hollywood star!!! Happy New Year, Kim!
    Angie@Angie’s Recipes recently posted..Cherry Pistachio Spelt Bundt CakeMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 1, 2015 at 6:10 am

    I love the book Wild – so inspiring! And that fudge looks amazing. Wishing you a wonderful new soul for this year and all the ones that come next…
    ladyfi recently posted..Cute overloadMy Profile

  • Reply
    Suzanne Lucas
    January 1, 2015 at 6:15 am

    Kim, you are one courageous woman. It’s wonderful to see that all the hell you’ve been through hasn’t diminished your soul. May 2015 bring you huge glimmers of light and happiness to light up your life once again. Happy New Year!
    Suzanne Lucas recently posted..The Day I Found Out I Was an AlienMy Profile

  • Reply
    Joan Peterson
    January 1, 2015 at 6:31 am

    Happy New Year to one of the more interesting people I know. Your love for Kay was unequivocal and so deep. We can feel that in every blog post you write. 2015 will lead you to new places and new insights. I look forward to much more.

  • Reply
    January 1, 2015 at 6:54 am

    A Happy New Year to you Kim! Every time I read your posts I connect with you. Can’t explain it but I do! My favorite quote is “Never, never, never give up!” Love it! Hey, I also got 2 handbags for Christmas!!!!
    debbie recently posted..Cranberry Christmas CakeMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 1, 2015 at 7:57 am

    Wishing you a very happy new year! I hope that 2015 is filled with only good things!

    one of my highlights was your blog!
    Hilary recently posted..Cheers to the New Year! Wordless WednesdayMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 1, 2015 at 8:30 am

    Happy New Year Kim. Love you. 2014 has been one of the hardest years for me. I’ve seen “the hope” that was growing in my heart in the last 2 years totally destroyed, but I believe it was a lesson I HAD to learn and I will take this lesson and build my new life on new basis. A lesson to learn is never something bad. I’m open to the 2015 new lessons!
    Love you
    Nikky44 recently posted..Gratitude Day 8: Happy Birthday M…….My Profile

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      January 4, 2015 at 9:44 am

      God will use your voice for His purpose. He already is.
      He never wastes a “Pain.”
      Love you, sweet girl. xxxxxx KISSSSSSSSSSSS
      My Inner Chick recently posted..All Roads Out Of Hell Lead HomeMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 1, 2015 at 8:32 am

    Now you’ve got me hungry for FUDGE!! Yours looks just like what my late aunt used to make, and I can affirm that it was spectacular! I’m impressed by your daddy’s maturity — not a lot of 17-year-olds would embrace the next phase of life as readily as he did, and you’re blessed to still have his advice and love. Hope Mr. L. took you some place wonderful, Kim, and that you’ll LOVE using that red purse! Happy 2015, dear!!
    Debbie recently posted..Love in the AfternoonMy Profile

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      January 4, 2015 at 9:41 am

      Blessings and love sent to you, Debbie.
      Now & Always. xxxx

  • Reply
    Chris Carter
    January 1, 2015 at 9:30 am

    I love everything that penetrated you deeply this year and carried you higher…

    Keep holding on to the light of beautiful things, people, acts, faith. You always take me to a new place of peace amidst the hell you dwell. THAT is miraculous, my dear friend.

    YOU are miraculous.

    Read “Fly A Little Higher” and “Rare Bird”- both books will MOVE you, and lift you higher as well. My two faves for the year.
    Chris Carter recently posted..The Christmas Story…Are You In It?My Profile

  • Reply
    Vidya Sury
    January 1, 2015 at 10:28 am

    Have I ever told you that reading your blogs is like coming home?

    Love you more than the droplets of water that twinkle on the leaves in the lotus pond in my home town.

    Hugs. Love you Kim. Waiting for your book.
    Vidya Sury recently posted..Thank Outside The Box With GratitudeMy Profile

  • Reply
    Valentine Logar
    January 1, 2015 at 10:53 am

    All your loves, beautiful and thankfully you share them, reminding us there is still things in this world worth it.

    The music! Oh Kim, the music! Thank you for this one.

    I love and adore you. I am hoping to see you this year once again.

    Valentine Logar recently posted..Just YesMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 1, 2015 at 12:31 pm

    What a wonderful, life-affirming post to start the new year. There is joy all around us every minute of every day. We’ve only to open ourselves to it. Love the handbags!! Happy New Year, dear Kim. Hugs!
    injaynesworld recently posted..injaynesworld “Looking Back and Ahead…”My Profile

  • Reply
    Brenda Florestano
    January 1, 2015 at 1:35 pm

    So good to read that you are coming back. Nothing will replace Kay’s place in your heart, but light and love are pouring in from other places. God is restoring the life to your soul, and I rejoice with you in that. I am thankful for the music in 2014, particularly from the mouths and hands of my boys as they join with others to make my heart swell with rapture. Also for hardships that drive me to Jesus, because as He gets bigger, the hardships get smaller.

  • Reply
    January 1, 2015 at 3:57 pm

    WE still have some fudge at home———— readers come and have some. 2014 was ok, but
    so many crazy things going on in our unpredictable world. But we also have a lot of good things
    going on too. the best thing is to try and be positive. I know it is hard sometimes but it so good
    for our health.
    Happy New Year Everyone

    Love You Kim

  • Reply
    Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella
    January 1, 2015 at 5:17 pm

    We adore you Kim. You are the best voice for bringing domestic violence issues to light because of your raw passion. I think that is obvious from your most popular posts of 2014. Now I’m off to look up Wild! Thanks for your recommendation. May 2015 be a kickarse year for you Dear Kim! xxx
    Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella recently posted..Galette des Rois – A French traditionMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 2, 2015 at 5:12 am

    My dearest Kim, I squealed with delight when I saw Kay’s shoe with the fudge. You are so awesome! Love you so much from so far away. You are an angel walking earth giving us all a reminder that life does carry on even in the darkest of times, you find and give us light.
    I couldn’t agree with you more about cats too, even though our old girl wee’d on our bed this morning! What a bladdy nightmare!
    Hugs and kisses to you hon.
    🙂 Mandy xoxoxoxo
    Mandy recently posted..Run, Run, RunMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 2, 2015 at 6:37 am

    I love you and your heart, Kim! Happy 2015!
    Alison recently posted..2014: A RecapMy Profile

  • Reply
    Lady Jennie
    January 2, 2015 at 8:09 am

    What a recap! There is so much life here. Though your old carefree life before sorrow is now decayed mulch, new things are growing out of it like that rose. This makes me happy, Kimmie.
    Lady Jennie recently posted..Visiting RouenMy Profile

  • Reply
    Susan Casey
    January 2, 2015 at 8:16 am

    Happy New Year my friend. Another lovely, powerful post from a lovely, beautiful and powerful soul. I will carry this with me today:

    “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”—Rumi

    And another favorite of mine by Leonard Cohen:

    “There is a crack in everything.
    That’s how the light gets in.”

    Peace, blessings and love!

  • Reply
    January 2, 2015 at 10:27 am

    Sweet! Your dad and my dad have the same hairdo 🙂 I read Wild a couple of weeks ago too and really loved it. I’ve been backcountry camping a handful of times, but all of a sudden I have this urge to take a REALLY long hike. Here’s to a new year.
    Jeri recently posted..#YearInReview: Happy Holidays #2014My Profile

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      January 4, 2015 at 9:32 am

      there is something utterly beautiful about being alone with your thoughts, reflecting on your life, and learning from your experiences.

      Especially, when you are walking on the PCT. xx
      My Inner Chick recently posted..All Roads Out Of Hell Lead HomeMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 3, 2015 at 12:18 pm

    This is beautiful and so are you. I love the photo of Kay as a child. Those are powerful words. She didn’t know. That should be posted everywhere, on every corner where all can see it and take it to heart. She didn’t know.

    Happy New Year, Darling.

  • Reply
    January 3, 2015 at 4:14 pm

    I have to tell you, it gives ME such comfort and hope knowing that there IS the possibility of rising above and out of the depths of despair. People say it is possible, but it is quite another to SEE someone do it…like you. Thank you! And God bless 🙂

  • Reply
    Gary aka klahanie
    January 3, 2015 at 4:39 pm

    Hey Kim,

    The highway to hell can lead to the highway of hope. I know that your powerful verbalisation brings a modicum of comfort and a defiance that life can get even better.

    Here’s to a peaceful, hopeful New Year to you and your loved ones.

    Gary 🙂 xx
    Gary aka klahanie recently posted..The Wee Folks Christmas Wish, 2014.My Profile

  • Reply
    Coffee and Crumpets
    January 3, 2015 at 9:31 pm

    Happy New Year, Kim. Wishing you all the best in 2015 and more of that amazing strength and passion you possess.

    Coffee and Crumpets recently posted..Yuzu Meringue TartMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 3, 2015 at 10:21 pm

    A very happy new year to you for 2015! I’m so pleased to have met another wonderful blogging friend. But much more than that, you’re a voice of reason & justice for so many, many people out there. I hope it rings louder & truer to those who need it most. Big love xoxo
    Alice recently posted..Italian Panforte Cake & a Giveaway!My Profile

  • Reply
    January 3, 2015 at 11:53 pm

    You are awesome, Kim. You inspire me over and over again. Happy 2015, sweets xxx
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  • Reply
    Kristi Campbell
    January 4, 2015 at 3:40 pm

    So much love and peace to you Kim. xxoo
    I hope that 2015 brings you many many memories of feeling the warm sun bleed onto your face. <3
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  • Reply
    Amy Tong
    January 4, 2015 at 11:22 pm

    Happy 2015 and I want to wish you a happy and healthy year! What a great post to highlight 2014! Truly enjoy reading every single one of your post. 🙂 That red purse is gorgeous. And your Daddy is so handsome. Now I know where you get your pretty genes from. 😉
    Amy Tong recently posted..Wähfles Desserts and Coffee—Restaurant ReviewMy Profile

  • Reply
    Renee Johnson
    January 5, 2015 at 6:09 pm

    Wow. This is such a fantastic, amazingly touching post.

    Your dad was only 17 when you were born? He is proof of youth being no excuse for poor parenting. He obviously did a terrific job with you so — Bravo Dad! The loss of Kay must weigh heavily on him too, but I bet he is so proud of you!

    “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”—Rumi — Love this quote. The light is fully shining in you and I can sense glimpses of peace for you and your family.

  • Reply
    January 7, 2015 at 8:59 am

    I never see the video you made with your sister without being just filled with so much sadness over the brutal selfish and deranged waste of it all. You are my example of a strong women trying to make a difference and shaping a triumph out of adversity, My blessings to you and your family always xxx
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  • Reply
    January 7, 2015 at 9:14 am

    You are the best to make me laugh then cry and laugh again. I learnt a lot about myself in 2014. And every time I felt like being caught up in guilt again, I would remember your words, your bright and wise words.
    May you keep sharing, writing, leaving fully. We are alive!
    Loads if love. Xxxxxxx

  • Reply
    Ellen M. Gregg
    January 7, 2015 at 11:40 am

    I’m a little late to the party, and yet I’m still calling “Happy New Year” as I’m out and about. So, there’s that. 😉
    2014… It was, for the most part, a blur. It’s streaks of color and light and shadow punctuated by occasional snapshots and videos.
    On New Year’s Eve, when I was deep into preparing for 2015, I found myself clutching the kitchen counter for support when I was overtaken by the kind of sobbing that can land you on the floor. I don’t know where the storm came from, and it was over as quickly as it passed. It happened twice more, over the course of the day. I attribute it to releasing and to grieving.
    Not long after midnight on New Year’s Day, I was completing my unraveling-2014 work. One of the last questions had to do with the one thing that was most memorable in 2014; my favorite memory. My response was, it was the first gathering of Compass after my soul sister’s son’s passing; just six days later.
    She was there, as she’s a part of Compass, and it was anyone’s guess as to how the gathering might go, since we’d all been present with her on “that day.” we knew it could be anything or everything or nothing. We laughed our asses off. We drank wine and ate chocolate, and were spurred, somehow, to sing the “Hallelujah Chorus” as it’s traditionally sung, on our feet, and also in three-part harmony. Josh Groban’s rendition of “Vincent” finally brought the tears, and yet they were gentle showers.
    It’s my favorite memory because we were so fully present and open to what was and what might be and what could be. There was no controlling it. There was being in it, fully immersed and receptive and in tune. Arguably, as life is meant to be lived. xoxo
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  • Reply
    January 7, 2015 at 3:25 pm

    A belated happy new year, Kim. I’m glad we found one another this year; your words touch my heart. My your 2015 be a little less insane and a little (or a lot) more light.
    Dana recently posted..Fake it till you make it: My January Love ListMy Profile

  • Reply
    Anna @ shenANNAgans
    January 8, 2015 at 2:17 am

    You are AWESOME! You are an INSPIRATION! You are FUN! And you are so dang SASSY!
    You revived my faith in humanity and you make me want to be better!
    I am so grateful we connected in 2014, I love that you are in my life.
    Hopefully one of these days we can hang out.
    Happy New Year Lady!!!
    Giant hugs and kisses, and all my love from Australia via Asia.
    Anna @ shenANNAgans recently posted..What’s Crackin’ 2015My Profile

  • Reply
    January 12, 2015 at 1:58 am

    I am so in love with Ed Sheeran and I love love love that video and song. Just this morning I watched video after video of him, he is so talented and down to earth. I must have watched that video 20 times and still clicked on the link just now.
    So much of 2014 was great, going through hell has a way of making a person appreciate the things that truly matter and the things many people take for granted.
    much love from up north.
    Carrie recently posted..You Never Know What a Narcissist Is Capable OfMy Profile

  • Reply
    January 12, 2015 at 4:29 pm

    You are truly one of the coolest chicks on the planet!!!
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