In Memory of Kay

You Rise Over & Over Again


——-My sister was murdered by her husband on May 26th 2010. The mourning never ends. See you on the other side, my lovely Kay.—-

 

Your face is fading.

 

I see the outline inside my mind.

 

Eyes. Ears. High Cheekbones.

 

Your perfect nose.

 

I am terrified of letting go.

 

I only know a world with

 

You loving me.

 

Your hair covers me like a dark water.

 

The long strands caught between my teeth.

 

I see your smile beneath, distant, blurred.

 

A thick pink fog.

 

In my dreams, you are unreachable, untouchable.

 

Sitting on a ledge, an edge, leaning away

 

From me.

 

When I awaken, your name is written upon my lips.

 

Your voice lifts thru air like a million brilliant birds.

 

You slide next to me in words.

 

You rise from the soil, the marble, the grave.

 

You rise over and over again.

 

—–This poem is dedicated to Michael,  Aaron, & Jordan.  I  Love  YOU  all  sooooooooooooo  MUCH.

—-Kay’s Walk To End Domestic Violence on May 31st:  Sign up Here: http://www.theduluthmodel.org/events.html

Don’t Wait One More Day.  Get Help Now:   http://www.thehotline.org/


Subscribe To My Inner Chick

Never miss an update!

You have Successfully Subscribed!

You Might Also Like

55 Comments

  • Reply
    Nikky44
    May 26, 2014 at 12:07 pm

    Thinking of you today <3

  • Reply
    Bren
    May 26, 2014 at 12:11 pm

    Oh my, I’m so sorry Kim. Sending you virtual hugs and kisses my friend. xoxo
    Bren recently posted..You’re Playing With FireMy Profile

  • Reply
    Debbie
    May 26, 2014 at 12:28 pm

    Kim, I didn’t realize today was the anniversary of your dear sister’s death. I’ll say an extra prayer for you and your family — in the meantime, hang onto those happy memories! Love the photo of her polishing your toenails. She looks so angelic in her white dress!
    Debbie recently posted..Start Seeing MiraclesMy Profile

  • Reply
    lisa thomson-The Great Escape...
    May 26, 2014 at 1:03 pm

    Such a difficult day for you, Kim and your whole family. Thinking of you <3 Your poetry once again, tells the story of your mourning so incredibly. That's a lovely pic of you both! Hugs xo
    lisa thomson-The Great Escape… recently posted..Coming Out of the Marital ClosetMy Profile

  • Reply
    Marie
    May 26, 2014 at 1:13 pm

    I remembered the date when coming back home today. I am thinking about you, your family, Kay’s boys. She’ll rise over and over again Kim, She’ll never stop.
    Sending you much LOVE on this tough day.
    xxxxxx
    Marie recently posted..My life these days…My Profile

  • Reply
    Trish
    May 26, 2014 at 1:18 pm

    Thinking of you.

  • Reply
    Shay from Trashy Blog
    May 26, 2014 at 1:48 pm

    Sending prayers your way right now.
    Shay from Trashy Blog recently posted..The Pool Is OpenMy Profile

  • Reply
    Joan Peterson
    May 26, 2014 at 2:08 pm

    Thinking of you today, dear Kim. Your poem is powerful and lovely. Thanks for sharing it. See you at the walk and we will think of Kay again.

  • Reply
    Michael Ann Pedone
    May 26, 2014 at 2:38 pm

    Love and grace to you and your family today….. xoxoxox

  • Reply
    Elephant's Child
    May 26, 2014 at 2:39 pm

    Hurting for you, hurting with you. Today and every day.
    Hugs.

  • Reply
    Kristi Anderson Lancaster
    May 26, 2014 at 3:30 pm

    Rest in peace Kay.I think of you often.

  • Reply
    Tia
    May 26, 2014 at 3:55 pm

    Love You, sending hugs and kisses your way.

  • Reply
    debbie
    May 26, 2014 at 4:00 pm

    Sorrow has no words…just sending love your way…..
    debbie recently posted..Sauerkraut LatkesMy Profile

  • Reply
    Alison
    May 26, 2014 at 4:38 pm

    Thinking of you and loving you from Malaysia. xoxo
    Alison recently posted..A Twin UpdateMy Profile

  • Reply
    Kathy @ SMART Living 365.com
    May 26, 2014 at 4:52 pm

    Sending you light and love. You are not alone. ~Kathy
    Kathy @ SMART Living 365.com recently posted..Essentialism—A Better Way To Describe Minimalism?My Profile

  • Reply
    lisa
    May 26, 2014 at 5:32 pm

    What a beautiful tribute to Kay.
    Sending you hugs, my friend. xo.

  • Reply
    Chris Carter
    May 26, 2014 at 7:08 pm

    Oh God. This is the day…

    I touch Kay’s cross and cry.

    For you.

    For Kay.

    For this.

    I just know that when God calls you home Kim, she will be the very first one you will see-

    Outstretched arms.

    Smiling.

    Radiating even brighter than you remember.

    Every detail clear as crystal.

    And you will embrace her as she wisps you into the gates of Heaven, THRILLED to show you the way! I see you holding hands together and I watch you skip away toward the illuminating light off into the distance… through the golden gates, side by side, swinging your arms together with hands clenched tight.

    And everything will be whole again.

    For now?

    I picture her beautiful face in tears… for YOU. For Aaron and Jordan, whom she left behind. For the pain that lingers here on earth within the footprints of her love. I envision her urging you to stay strong and desperately wanting you to know she is at Home with her Heavenly Father…

    Exactly where she belongs.
    Chris Carter recently posted..Ten Years of ThankfulMy Profile

  • Reply
    Balroop Singh
    May 26, 2014 at 7:34 pm

    Words seem so lame in front of this irreparable loss…still we have just words now, just memories to wait and wait…why are people so unreasonable, so cruel…why does God give so much of misery? I know it is so heartbreaking Kim, day after day…year after year, trying to reconcile with such a great loss! I wish we could do something! Innocent people continue to die…

    I pray for your peace of mind…sending you love, my dear friend.
    Balroop Singh recently posted..The Amazing Gifts Of Life We Don’t See…My Profile

  • Reply
    Jann
    May 26, 2014 at 7:44 pm

    An anniversary of such heavy sorrow. Know that your virtual community is with you in spirit, Kim. I know Kay’s Walk with give you and so many others the comfort they need. A big hug from Sicily. xxxx
    Jann recently posted..Comment on A Story of Sicilian Bread by JannMy Profile

  • Reply
    ladyfi
    May 26, 2014 at 8:42 pm

    What a heavy day for you, but this is so beautifully written and full of love.
    ladyfi recently posted..Viking surpriseMy Profile

  • Reply
    nan @ lbddiaries
    May 26, 2014 at 9:21 pm

    You are healing, my sweet Kim. I can read it in your words. Healing does not mean letting go. It just means you can take a breath now and maybe get much needed oxygen and that your broken heart is *maybe* not bleeding quite so much so you can live on until you see Kay again. She will never fade because you have given her to us and we can share her back to you.
    nan @ lbddiaries recently posted..He Didn’t Have To BeMy Profile

    • Reply
      nan @ lbddiaries
      May 27, 2014 at 9:13 am

      Oooo just saw what Vidya Sury wrote down there. It is a challenge. How can we love Kim even more?? I love you more than my blooming peonies out in my front yard. And I LOOOOOOVED my peonies.

  • Reply
    Rita@thecraftyexpat
    May 26, 2014 at 10:16 pm

    Goose bumps… Thinking of you Kim. Love, prayers and good thoughts are sent your way.
    Rita@thecraftyexpat recently posted..The lovely town of BrightMy Profile

  • Reply
    TheKitchenLioness
    May 26, 2014 at 11:33 pm

    Dear Kim, I was thinking about you yesterday as I did remember the anniversary of Kay´s death and I talked yout it to my family, I have often mentioned you and you fabulous blog to them – they always listen, quietly, and my four girls (13,11,8,6) were sending you virtual hugs and many loving thoughts – they all know that the issue of domestic violence is one that I feel very strongly about…
    Keeping you in my thoughts and wishing you all the very best for Kay´s Memorial Walk on May 31st!
    Hugs and kisses from afar,
    Andrea
    TheKitchenLioness recently posted..FFwD – Smoked Salmon WafflesMy Profile

  • Reply
    Vidya Sury
    May 27, 2014 at 12:16 am

    That photo made me cry, Kim.

    You are always in my thoughts. I feel as though I can feel your heart beat.

    On May 31, I’ll be right there with you in spirit.

    Love you more than the gorgeous mauve bougainvillea tree flowering all over the place near my house.

    Hugs. One day we’ll meet.
    Vidya Sury recently posted..Making Time to Smell the FlowersMy Profile

  • Reply
    Liz
    May 27, 2014 at 4:04 am

    You’ve made sure that Kay will never be forgotten. xoxo
    Liz recently posted..Fudge Topped Marshmallow Ice Cream #IceCreamTuesday #SkinnyTipMy Profile

  • Reply
    Hilary
    May 27, 2014 at 4:06 am

    I am so sorry.. the anniversary is always so hard… but then again everyday is too… sending love

  • Reply
    Ellen M. Gregg
    May 27, 2014 at 5:28 am

    ((( Kim ))) Holding you and your family in heartfelt space. Prayers for you, prayers for Kay, and prayers for inner strength for all girls and women, that they will be able to say “NO!” and walk away at the first inkling of warning, or sign of abuse.

    Love and peace, dearie. xoxo
    Ellen M. Gregg recently posted..Learn to Live By Your IntuitionMy Profile

  • Reply
    Barbara
    May 27, 2014 at 7:08 am

    You poetry is so deep and so moving, Kim. Haunting, really. I know Kay is very proud of all you’ve done, and continue to do, in the fight against domestic violence.
    Sending lots of love…
    b
    Barbara recently posted..A Melange of Thoughts…My Profile

  • Reply
    Angie@Angie's Recipes
    May 27, 2014 at 7:18 am

    What a sweet and beautiful photo!
    You are in my thought, Kim. (((HUG)))
    Angie
    Angie@Angie’s Recipes recently posted..Sprouted Quinoa Salad with ApricotsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Liz
    May 27, 2014 at 8:21 am

    Thinking of you too Kim. I’m walking for Kay on Saturday : )

  • Reply
    Amy@SoulDipper
    May 27, 2014 at 10:02 am

    Bodies may fade. Memories may glitch, But Souls only glow brighter. Thanks be!

    A big Golden Blanket of Love to Kay and you, Kim!
    Amy@SoulDipper recently posted..Thankful for the AfflictionMy Profile

  • Reply
    Choc Chip Uru
    May 27, 2014 at 1:51 pm

    Your ability to honour Kay is so beautiful again and again. Such a lovely commemorative poem, you are in my thoughts.

    Hugs
    Uru
    Choc Chip Uru recently posted..CCU Undercover: Heston For Coles LaunchMy Profile

  • Reply
    Annette Molitor
    May 27, 2014 at 2:03 pm

    Hi Kim, I love how you portray Kay with your magical words and art. You are amazing. Kay is sooo proud of you!!

    annette

  • Reply
    Sandra
    May 27, 2014 at 2:49 pm

    Thank you so much for helping us to know just how awesome Kay is!

  • Reply
    solidgoldcreativity
    May 27, 2014 at 4:04 pm

    All my love to you dear Kim, and to your family and Kay’s boys. On this anniversary and every day. You are beloved xxx

  • Reply
    dad
    May 27, 2014 at 4:33 pm

    That’s just like Kay, polishing toe-nails or washing your feet. She was a natural care giver.
    Many times when my back or neck was sore, she would come over and give me a massage.
    She was one of a kind.
    Kim, I love you more than the whole world
    Dad

  • Reply
    Kimberly
    May 27, 2014 at 4:39 pm

    Rise again and again.
    Yes she does.
    Always.

    Love you hard xoxo
    Kimberly recently posted..A Little Bit Of This. A Lot Of That.My Profile

  • Reply
    Gary
    May 27, 2014 at 4:41 pm

    On such a painful, poignant day, I send you thoughts of hope and the love for your sister resonates with every word and fibre of your heart and soul.

    Bless you, dear lady.

    Gary
    Gary recently posted..The Moon, Sponsored By….My Profile

  • Reply
    Jeri
    May 27, 2014 at 5:11 pm

    The last line says so much. Sending a cyber-hug your way.
    Jeri recently posted..#Poetry: The Song of the Busy BloggerMy Profile

  • Reply
    Hotly Spiced
    May 27, 2014 at 7:10 pm

    I’m so sorry for you Kim. These anniversaries must be so painful. I hope the day went by for you without too much grief. Your memories of your sister are so powerful and your words celebrate your special bond with great honour xx
    Hotly Spiced recently posted..Rocket and Pomegranate SaladMy Profile

  • Reply
    Alice
    May 28, 2014 at 4:54 am

    Thinking of you Kim and your family and your sister’s boys. Sad to think that time passes, but sometimes the pain hasn’t. It’s an incredible community here of people who love & support your vision (& cause) for a just world for women, where they can live without fear.

    Hold onto that vision!!! You’re hard work will not go unnoticed!
    Alice recently posted..A wholesome recipe for Macadamia nut wafers, (GF).My Profile

  • Reply
    Charlotte
    May 28, 2014 at 7:58 am

    Oh, my sweet… Sending so many positive thoughts and prayers and well wishes your way. Anniversaries are the worst. Your sister’s memory will never fade. XOXO

  • Reply
    Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella
    May 28, 2014 at 7:10 pm

    *BIG HUGS* Kim all the way from Hawaii! I am closer to you than normal so hopefully you can feel them! 🙂 xxx
    Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella recently posted..An Unexpected Side of Christchurch, New ZealandMy Profile

  • Reply
    Ananya Kiran
    May 28, 2014 at 9:03 pm

    A big tight hug from me !
    Ananya Kiran recently posted..Mrs INDIA WASHINGTON – The End ??My Profile

  • Reply
    Monica
    May 28, 2014 at 11:52 pm

    Kim, beautiful poem. I love the way you remember yous sister. But I have to say, I’m beginning to think May is a very say month. I lost my mother in May. My cousin lost her mother in May. You, a sister, and some of my favorite celebrities (Jackie Kennedy, Frank Sinatra) also left us in May, including the amazing, extraordinary Maya Angelou. Sigh.
    Monica recently posted..Close to Home: Observations from a Former UCSB MomMy Profile

  • Reply
    Dana
    May 29, 2014 at 5:21 am

    I read this on the 26th and I didn’t know what to say here. I still don’t, but I wanted you to know that I’m thinking of you and your family, Kim. xoxo
    Dana recently posted..19 Tips for a Healthy MarriageMy Profile

  • Reply
    Jennifer Wolfe
    May 29, 2014 at 12:21 pm

    It never goes away, does it? Ebb and flow, ebb and flow. xxoo
    Jennifer Wolfe recently posted..Wednesday Morning Musing On Mockingbirds, Motherhood, and TimeMy Profile

  • Reply
    Ameena
    June 1, 2014 at 5:39 am

    Your sister would be so touched to read this Kim, just as I am.
    Ameena recently posted..the takeawayMy Profile

  • Reply
    countingducks
    June 2, 2014 at 5:04 am

    The way you hold her in your heart and memory, and use her experience to conquer domestic violence is an enduring testament to the power of love, and your character
    countingducks recently posted..Off On Me HolsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Brittnei
    June 2, 2014 at 7:50 am

    This blew my mind when I read the subtitle of this post. I know it was 4 years ago, but I am deeply sorry for you loss. What a wonderful poem. I love how you have the help line site at the bottom of your post. Thank you for sharing something some personal with us.
    Brittnei recently posted..Countdown in Style- Week 24My Profile

  • Reply
    Amy Tong
    June 2, 2014 at 11:46 am

    Your poem and thoughts always touch my heart. Thank you for sharing and please take care…..xoxoxo
    Amy Tong recently posted..Things to Do with Kids in San FranciscoMy Profile

  • Reply
    Phil
    June 4, 2014 at 12:22 pm

    Reaching out across the internet to give you a big hug. As long as you remember the good times and love you had for each other she is never truly gone.
    Phil recently posted..50 Shades! The Musical. Raunchy, filthy, sexy fun in NYC.My Profile

  • Reply
    Lady Jennie
    June 5, 2014 at 9:22 am

    ((Hugs)) Kim.
    Lady Jennie recently posted..Summer Rice SaladMy Profile

  • Reply
    Jodi @ Heal Now and Forever
    June 5, 2014 at 11:17 am

    How was the walk, lovey?
    Jodi @ Heal Now and Forever recently posted..Are you too needy or too sensitive?My Profile

  • Leave a Reply

    CommentLuv badge