Kim's Blogs

Incident at Gatwick Airport

Posted on May 6, 2013

Airport DogPhoto by Meghan Barr.

 

(( Picture it.))

 

We’re leaving London
and the lines are merging round baggage claim like a multi colored snake on
smack.

 

Why the hell do people dress up nicely to fly?  They are only going to get wrinkled,
crinkled, smelly, and ugly anyhow.

 

We’re standing in line.
The crazy twisting disquieting eternity of a  line.

 

Passports, boarding passes, carry on bags, lotions in
plastic, and Mr. Liverpool needs to show his green card since he is termed an “Alien.”

 

Half way through the grueling process, a police officer edges
into the winding line with this little mutt of a dog.

 

His black and white tail is wagging wildly and you can tell
he loves his job, wants to kick some passenger ass.

 

Suddenly, I get an image of that movie, Midnight Express,
where the Turkish police find hashish on this dude and triple hell breaks
loose.  He ends up in a Turkish prison
for most of his adult life.

 

Horrendous.
Frightening.

 

So, this little mutt is sniffing luggage, carry on bags,
purses, feet…

 

He is smelling his way round the endless lines seeking out hashish
& bad stuff that passengers should not be bringing on airplanes or
anywhere.

 

Everybody gets a big giggle out of the little mutt.

 

Isn’t he cute?  Isn’t
he adorable?  I wonder how much he gets
paid for sniffing?

 

After half an hour, he makes his way toward us.

 

Sniff.  Wag.  Sniff.

 

Then he begins circling round my carry on bag like he has
mad cow disease.

 

“What you have in there?”
The police officer asks snottily.

 

I unzip my bag.
“Nothing.”  I say.

 

“What’s that?”   He points.

 

Shit.  Shit.  Daaaaamn It.
I’m such a dork.

 

“H-h-half a sandwich.”
I mutter idiotically, terrifyingly.

 

“Does it have meat in it?”

 

“No,  just avocado.  Oh, yeah, and some lettuce.”

 

I wonder why he wants to know.

 

“I have to confiscate that, Miss.”  “He stands with his hands crossed over his chest.  “Now.”

 

I observe Mr. Liverpool shaking his head from the corner of
my eye & hear my son whisper to my other son–

“It just had to be mom, didn’t it?”

 

The officer scribbles something about the sandwich on my
boarding pass and all of us end up in a back room where the bad people go
because every single piece of our luggage needs to be x-rayed now.

 

Perhaps they presume I have more avocado sandwiches, or god
forbid,  bologna sandwiches.

 

Mr.  Liverpool
is still shaking his head right to left—left to right.

 

“It had to be you.” He says again.

 

“Don’t say one more word.”
I warn.  “Not one more solitary
word.”

 

After an hour, we’re allowed back into line with the other
law abiding citizens.

 

I notice the little mutt is jumping up and down the police
officer’s leg because my avocado sandwich is sticking out of his pocket.

 

“I bet I know what he’s having for dinner tonight.”  My son laughs,  nudging me.

Moral to the story: Don’t save the other half of your sandwich
until later.  Eat it all.  Savor it all.
Love it all.  Life is too short,
dumb ass

—Darling Reader,  have you had any embarassing incidents like this?  Do tell.

xxxx

NOTE:  Kay’s Walk To End Domestic Violence will be on Sat.  June 1st @ 11:00  on the Waterfront Trail.

Click Here To Register

or contact me personally to donate siammuse@msn.com


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136 Comments

  • Reply
    adrianairis
    May 6, 2013 at 1:46 pm

    So I can’t believe I could be the first comment so I ran. Virtually…

    To me with bath salts Miami airport on my way to Puerto Rico,
    I guess they thought it was cocaine… So much of it as well.
    adrianairis recently posted..Not Hemingway…My Profile

    • Reply
      adrianairis
      May 6, 2013 at 2:06 pm

      reading back bath salts don’t sound good either. Sea salt scented with lavender oil. roflol

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      May 8, 2013 at 7:00 pm

      haaaa,
      yeah, I was a bit nervous about those zombie “Salts.”
      I’m like, WTH?
      Xxx
      My Inner Chick recently posted..Incident at Gatwick AirportMy Profile

  • Reply
    Terri Sonoda
    May 6, 2013 at 1:54 pm

    OMG I remember that movie, Midnight Express. I was actually stationed in Turkey while in the Air Force. We toured a Turkish Prison. It was really bad. I sure hope they’ve cleaned things up since way back then.
    Loved your story, though. Sorry ya’ll had to go through that.
    XOXOs
    Terri Sonoda recently posted..Monday Listicles – Ten FREE things I loveMy Profile

  • Reply
    Debi Pasricha
    May 6, 2013 at 2:05 pm

    You totally cracked me up on this post! Only airport security can turn a half of an avocado sandwich into a situation. And I love the moral of the story. xo
    Debi Pasricha recently posted..26.2: What Really Happened at the L.A. MarathonMy Profile

  • Reply
    Liz
    May 6, 2013 at 2:12 pm

    Hillarious
    Liz recently posted..Yahoo! Policy Can Turn Working Mothers Into CEOsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Liz
    May 6, 2013 at 2:13 pm

    Actually, hilarious (minus an l)
    Liz recently posted..Yahoo! Policy Can Turn Working Mothers Into CEOsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Barbara
    May 6, 2013 at 2:15 pm

    Well, there’s the incident at the Barcelona airport when my husband obviously had a brain fart and put 2 liters of Kettle One vodka in his carry-on, which led to everything being dragged out and examined…like the KY, etc.
    Fun!

    b
    Barbara recently posted..Caution: Attitude Adjustment Ahead!My Profile

  • Reply
    CAROLYN HUGHES
    May 6, 2013 at 2:18 pm

    You gave me such a great laugh reading this! I have never heard of sandwich security before 🙂 Bet you’re glad to be home!
    CAROLYN HUGHES recently posted..Treasures of your heart.My Profile

  • Reply
    Charlene Ross
    May 6, 2013 at 2:23 pm

    OMG – hilarious!

    Once when Dave and I were in Mexico before we were married (so you know – way back in the last century) everyone exiting customs had to pick a marble out of a can. The marbles were black or red. Black marble meant no inspection. Red marble meant inspection. The majority of the marbles were black. Guess who picked a red marble.

    Yes, that would be me.

    Fortunately I didn’t travel with avocado sandwiches back then!

    xoxo
    Love you Kim. 🙂
    Charlene Ross recently posted..I Went to a Cake Boss PartyMy Profile

  • Reply
    Jann Huizenga
    May 6, 2013 at 2:25 pm

    Oh, Kim, of course it had to be you! But in a good sweet way. Shame on TSA for turning a moment of innocent forgetfulness into an international incident, and making you feel like a criminal. Grrrr. You’d think they’d have better things to do with their time. I wouldn’t mind them taking the sandwich away, but the fact that they made your family X-ray all your stuff is JUST RIDICULOUS! (Hope otherwise you had a great trip! 🙂 ) xxxxxxxxxxxxxx0000000000
    Jann Huizenga recently posted..Dawn Stroll, Deepest SicilyMy Profile

  • Reply
    injaynesworld
    May 6, 2013 at 2:29 pm

    Did they think it was rigged to explode? Seriously. This is why I don’t travel. But since it happened to you, it’s funny. 🙂
    injaynesworld recently posted..injaynesworld it’s "The Colony…"My Profile

  • Reply
    jen
    May 6, 2013 at 2:41 pm

    We had breakfast our last morning on our vacay in St. Martian. So I get this bright idea to get these delish French cookies for my therapist who was literally saving. my sanity since the kids died.

    Anyway,we get to the airport and they asked me if I had any food. Not thinking I said oh just some cookies from a bakery.

    Crap!They pulled me out of the line And sent me thru an additional level of security. We had to run ..they were holding the flight because we were late over the darn cookies.Which BTW they didn’t even confiscate. Passengers not happy! So embarrassing.

  • Reply
    Annette Molitor
    May 6, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    Well Kim, Their is food involved, but no airport. And I happened to remember this a few days ago as my sister was telling me a funny story. I was feeling down in the dumps after leaving my ex spouse. My friend Susie invites me to her nephew’s grad party. So I agree. It was better than feeling sorry for myself. So I go their and I know Susie, her sister Phillis, mom and her daughter Andrea. No one else really. But there was good food, beverages and company. I would get my plate and mingle. There yard is big and there are tents covering the area where the food is. I had thrown myself together and whipped my hair up into a clip. And it was the clip that caused the nightmarish, hilarious, only can happen to Annette moment. I filled my plate and was going to reach for a beverage. But I can’t move. OMG! I’m stuck! A metal thingy in the top of the tent has a death grip on my hair clip. I roll my eyes to the left. No Susie. I roll my eyes to the right. I see Susie with her back toward me but she does not see me. She is oblivious to my momentary source of embarrassing torture. You can pull it off I tell myself. I try to gracefully stretch my arm forward to lay my plate on the table with a plan to quietly inconspicuously pull my arm back and gently release my clip from the monstrous metal bracket. But instead, as I’m trying to pull this off, I’m leaning forward and strands of hair are falling down into my face. My chest is protruding as though I’m trying to show of my boobs in my summer top. It was obvious at that point that I needed help. A girl caught a glimpse of me and busted out laughing. Then I meekly said in a quiet voice. Help! She took my plate and I gathered myself together. The girl apologizes for laughing. I casually say, “It’s okay.” I run to Susie to tell her what happened because I feel like a six year old girl who just fell of the bleachers in an auditorium filled with adults. She chuckles a little, and I say, Susie, it was unreal. It’s right up there with your story of the hideaway bed folding up on you at Goodwill. Gosh it felt good to just talk about it. I mean I had to. Because it was an ordeal I could not laugh about at that particular moment. But I can now.

    Hugs…Annette

  • Reply
    debbie
    May 6, 2013 at 3:30 pm

    I don’t have any airport stories because I don’t fly (at least not in many years) but I do remember Midnight Express. It scared the crap out of me….stuck in another country’s prison with that awful guard. Whew…
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  • Reply
    Beverly Diehl
    May 6, 2013 at 3:44 pm

    That little pooch is ADORABLE. I had a dog who loved green beans, and yes, seems like I’ve heard some dogs are avocado-lovers, though it doesn’t do good things for their digestive system in the end.

    You avocado sandwich smuggler, you!
    Beverly Diehl recently posted..Slut of the Month: Ava GardnerMy Profile

  • Reply
    Ellen M. Gregg
    May 6, 2013 at 4:48 pm

    OMG, that is priceless! The little drug-buster busts you for its lunch?! LOL 😀 Oh, Kim, that’s rich – and I don’t just mean the avocado sandwich.
    Most embarrassing was actually most potentially embarrassing – or horrifying. Picture it: me and my Ya-Yas on our road trip to Prince Edward Island. We’re minding our own business, driving along in our borrowed minivan (with a letter from its owner, just in case). We breeze through the checkpoint between Maine and Canada. Well after said checkpoint, Ya-Ya Jos confesses that she forgot her credentials. No license (you only need a license then) to verify she is who she says she is.
    Oh. em. gee.
    When we arrived back at that checkpoint a week later, to cross back onto U.S. soil, I was driving, and Jos was behind me in the passenger seat. All of us were wearing sunglasses and cheerful smiles. We held our collective breath until the nice security guards waved us through.
    We laugh about it now. It was part of the adventure. But at that time, not quite two years post-9/11? It was a really bad situation just waiting to happen.
    Welcome back, honey! Love. xoxo
    Ellen M. Gregg recently posted..Four ThoughtsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Tia
    May 6, 2013 at 5:04 pm

    You crack me up!

  • Reply
    solidgoldcreativity
    May 6, 2013 at 5:14 pm

    Funny and horrifying, I agree, Kim. I say that as one who’s been to the room where they send bad people too! Very glad you made it past the sandwich nazis back to us xxx

  • Reply
    Irene
    May 6, 2013 at 5:50 pm

    LMAO!!!! Fucking airports! Dude probably gave it to the dog after you left!
    “Yeah, let’s sneak illegal shit in my sandwich. Like they won’t look there ya know!”
    WFT?

  • Reply
    lisa thomson
    May 6, 2013 at 6:08 pm

    Wow, kind of scary! And then I had to laugh at the sons and hubby’s reaction. Don’t we always somehow ’embarass’ them? A German Shepard at the Honolulu airport arrivals liked my carry on bag and the officer had to look through it. There was an apple (good old Canadian apple) with one bite out of it. I guess I changed my mind. Dumb ass. I was lectured on bringing foreign fruit into the US. Embarassing.
    lisa thomson recently posted..The Good WifeMy Profile

  • Reply
    Hotly Spiced
    May 6, 2013 at 6:37 pm

    It’s the officer who should be embarrassed. Embarrassed his stupid dog got all excited over avocado. What sort of dog is attracted to avocado. And after they hauled you off and went through all your stuff because clearly, anyone with half a sandwich in their carry-on has to be a major threat, they then made you go back and wait in line? Wouldn’t they, in the form of an apology, just usher you straight through? Airline travel just isn’t getting any better xx
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  • Reply
    Blond Duck
    May 6, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    All that over half a sandwich? Good God.
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  • Reply
    Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell
    May 6, 2013 at 7:24 pm

    What’s so wrong about a sandwich????? It’s not even sharp!
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  • Reply
    Vidya Sury
    May 6, 2013 at 8:49 pm

    This time around, through our Toronto/London/Delhi/Bangalore flight, I had to open my hand baggage and unpack four glass bottles and show it to every security check – that was eight times. I even had to show them my spirally bound notebook. I secretly suspect they loved the bottles – shades of blue.

    😀 Sorry you had to go through what you did and sorry to say I was laughing as I read this! Come to think of it, I had a donut like thingy served by Air Canada – and I kept thinking I could been caught for carrying a weapon – it was so damn hard you know! I didn’t want to risk biting it for fear of an emergency trip to the dentist.

    Hugs! Love you more than all the avocado sandwiches in London. Love avocado – preferably guacamole!
    Vidya Sury recently posted..Laughter Is The Best Medicine – World Laughter DayMy Profile

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      May 9, 2013 at 1:59 pm

      Vidya,
      we must have been flying in opposite directions. Can you imagine meeting one another at the airport?

      I would have been in deep trouble for “FLIPPING OUT and Kissing & Hugging this Indian Woman!”

      Haaaaaaaaaaaa Xxxxxx
      My Inner Chick recently posted..Incident at Gatwick AirportMy Profile

  • Reply
    Kim Gagnon
    May 6, 2013 at 9:08 pm

    Oh Kimmy I can just see your face and feel your heat of embarrassment and agitation. You are truly an adventure!! Can’t wait to get together and hear about your trip! Love and miss you. Wine very soon!! Xoxoxo

  • Reply
    Bridget
    May 6, 2013 at 11:17 pm

    I usually just get caught with an illegal bottle of sunscreen in my carry on. 😉
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  • Reply
    ladyfi
    May 7, 2013 at 12:51 am

    Oh dear! I’m often stopped and asked to get my Kindle out…
    ladyfi recently posted..MetamorphosisMy Profile

  • Reply
    Valentine Logar
    May 7, 2013 at 4:01 am

    I am sorry, my giggle attack made me spew coffee. Sandwichs? Really? That is pretty funny. I thought you were allowed food, guess that will learn all of us.

    Bad woman you, smuggling sandwichs.

    Can’t wait to see you!

  • Reply
    Corinne Rodrigues
    May 7, 2013 at 5:24 am

    Haha…to funny…a beagle?
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  • Reply
    Alison
    May 7, 2013 at 5:27 am

    Fortunately, no!

    However, my sister had to give up a mini pot of yogurt once before boarding, as it was considered a ‘liquid’. She was like, IT IS FOOD!! 🙂

    Hope you had a terrific trip!
    Alison recently posted..The Good StuffMy Profile

  • Reply
    elizabeth
    May 7, 2013 at 6:02 am

    Kim,
    I did have something like that happen to me in Heathrow – got pulled off the line, had my bags checked twice and then got to go into a small room where I was aksed what I was doing in England. I was wearing black leather so someone said I looked l like a German terrorist – me – an Irish, Italian, English, Scottish,French girl??? Was very scary and this was in 1989! xx

  • Reply
    Britton Swingler
    May 7, 2013 at 7:16 am

    Hilarious!!

  • Reply
    marie
    May 7, 2013 at 9:29 am

    Oh my!!! Kim this is the kind of things that happen to me too………but I see I am not the only one. I am sure this cute little dog was starving.

    Something did happen to me too in Paris – I had to empty all my bag and everybody was starting looking at me suspiciously. At the end it was the battery of my camera making this mess!!

    Hope you had a great trip. Much love
    xx

  • Reply
    Lady Jennie
    May 7, 2013 at 10:05 am

    (giggle)

    Oh yes! Our story is worse.

    We were coming back from France and I thought my husband was farting constantly, and he thought I was farting constantly, but it was the camembert stowed away in my backpack! (blush)
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  • Reply
    Impulsive Addict
    May 7, 2013 at 10:35 am

    I tried to carry a flask on board one time. The price of alcohol on airplanes is ridiculous! When we flew home from Michigan last week, I scored 2 FREE bottles of wine. The flight attendant knew how stressed I was flying with 2 small children. And you know what? It was horrible! Disgusting, actually. But you never let free alcohol go to waste.

    I’ve missed you. I suck at blogging these days.
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  • Reply
    Debbie
    May 7, 2013 at 10:40 am

    Kim, this is so funny! I can easily see myself doing just this — saving food until later. Thank you, my friend, for warning me. Not that I’ve flown anywhere lately, but just in case, you know!

    I hate to say it, but that little “mutt” doesn’t have good taste like my Sheltie, who wouldn’t give a flying hoot for an avocado sandwich! Now, roast beast?? That’s an entirely different story, ha!
    Debbie recently posted..Spring means time for PromMy Profile

  • Reply
    nan @ lbddiaries
    May 7, 2013 at 11:15 am

    Well you know, K, I’ve heard of bands of roving avocados creating havoc and anarchy everywhere they go. Yes, and I know I’ve read stories about those avocado renegades who refuse to be made into guacamole. Total rebellion going on everywhere all caused by wild avocados. I know if you’d known this, you would have put that avocado down like the beastie it was. Now you will have your picture on posters in every airport as the woman who tried to smuggle an avocado across the border.
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  • Reply
    Sandy Webb
    May 7, 2013 at 11:29 am

    LOL…..somehow it does not surprise me that this happened to you!
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  • Reply
    Pat
    May 7, 2013 at 5:53 pm

    What a great giggle you’ve given me. Of course it was you. Who else?

    I haven’t been detained, but I used to work at the Charlotte airport. We used to celebrity watch. I think the silliest thing I ever saw was James Brown wearing his full length fur coat in Charlotte in August. In case you don’t know–August in CLT is about 99 degrees and 99 per cent humidity. He wasn’t singing “I Feel Good.”

    Hope you’re well.
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    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      May 10, 2013 at 12:19 pm

      What a fab sighting.
      Too bad you didn’t get a photo of the dude showing off his fur coat.
      I hope to god, it was FAKE fur!
      xxx LOVE
      My Inner Chick recently posted..Incident at Gatwick AirportMy Profile

  • Reply
    Bella
    May 7, 2013 at 6:14 pm

    Kim, those little sniffing mutts are the worse–that is if you don’t count the nosy passengers that stop to look why one is being pulled aside! I’m sorry this happened to you but at least you gave us a giggle! I could picture you alongside Mr. Liverpool saying, “It had to be you!” ha! OMG, priceless! I have never had such an experience but my mother did, not with a sniffing furry friend, mind you, but with a customs officer. He detected the smell of a half Iberian ham sandwich she had made herself before leaving Spain. You can imagine the brouhaha over bringing in a meat product into the country. After that, never again did she make herself a snack! hee hee! Hugs to you from Roxy and me! 🙂

  • Reply
    mamawolfe
    May 7, 2013 at 6:21 pm

    On one of my last trips home from DC I felt like an official dumb ass when I discovered I had left the can of diet Pepsi in my carry-on…fortunately my teens weren’t there to roll their eyeballs at me!
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  • Reply
    Monica
    May 7, 2013 at 9:30 pm

    Good moral, Kim. Lesson learned. I have a friend who went through something similar. She was traveling from Germany back to California and just before she left Berlin, she picked up an apple from the hotel and put it in her purse, planning to eat it at the airport, and forgot about it. That apple made it all the way to California and if there’s one thing you should know about traveling to this state, it is absolutely verboten to bring fruit of any kind into our state. She was all the say home, but held up for hours, all because of the apple. Boy did she get into trouble.
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  • Reply
    Stasha
    May 7, 2013 at 9:43 pm

    Made me giggle. Sorry! And how healthy is that mutt, begging for greens 😉
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  • Reply
    Jennie Liverpool
    May 8, 2013 at 3:39 am

    Well at least you didn’t have to strip off!

    En route to Egypt with Suzanna (my daughter) I set off the scanner buzzers. Although I was frisked and Iexplained that the cause was probably my dental inplant, they were having none of it. I was marched off by two very burly women and taken to a room with one chair in it.

    I really thought that this would be my “Midnight Express” moment. I had to strip off infront of said ladies, give them a twirl but fortunately, I was spared the rubber gloves treatment. The most embarrassing part? When I was led back to the line, I found Suzanna in an uncontrollable fit of laughter, taking photos, sending them to her Dad and sister and causing everyone around to stare at me, whispering ” Uh uh, looks like she’s had the rubber glove treatment”. Thanks Suze!

    It took about 30 seconds before I received my first text saying, “It would be you”. Recognise a theme here………….?

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      May 10, 2013 at 12:24 pm

      Miss Liverpool,
      I LOVE that story. Do they actually use the plastic gloves? OMG. disgusting.
      Yes, I can see this happening to you, as well. HAaa

      Xxx LOVE.
      My Inner Chick recently posted..Incident at Gatwick AirportMy Profile

  • Reply
    feeling beachie
    May 8, 2013 at 4:28 am

    Oh man… I didn’t know you couldn’t fly with food? Liquids sure, but bologna?

    I once had to fly to Vegas for work. I found out a day before the trip so I was pegged as a suspicious passenger and had to be frisked both ways. The first trip they missed this when I went through security, so I had to be escorted away from the gate. I am really thin and was wearing a very fitted shirt. They lady they took me to had to pad me down and I remember saying to her when she was feeling my top “Um, don’t you think you’d see something if I was hiding something.” She laughed in reply because she knew I was right.
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  • Reply
    Mandy - The Complete Cook Book
    May 8, 2013 at 6:22 am

    Darling Kim, I have just tried to re-subscribe to your blog but it says I am already registered -eek, where are my email notifications going then when your do a new post – they haven’t gone into my junk mail either!
    I have missed reading your words friend, so I hope it is all sorted out. I see you are not subscribed to my blog either – oh how I really hate technology some days – we were doing just fine then something out in the cosmos decided to mess us around!
    I had to have a wee giggle about your sandwich story although how incredibly infuriating and frustrating – what did he think you were hiding in your avo!
    Have a beautiful day.
    🙂 Mandy xo
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  • Reply
    Elisabeth Kinsey
    May 8, 2013 at 7:20 am

    You know, I have a chapter in my memoir (forth coming) about being deported from England. It gets worse if you have too much luggage. Great descriptions! I agree, don’t bring anything suspicious into England. Even half a sandwich.

  • Reply
    Dad
    May 8, 2013 at 7:49 am

    You are definitely your mother’s dauther.
    Love You
    Dad

  • Reply
    Dad
    May 8, 2013 at 7:51 am

    You Are definitely your mother’s daughter.
    Love You
    Dad

  • Reply
    Pure Complex
    May 8, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    Hey I LOVE to save my sandwiches LOL. But no mutt would be eating mine LOL. And just hearing this story reminds me of my mom.. it would be her to do this to me while traveling too LOL. I loved this story 🙂

  • Reply
    Chasing Joy
    May 8, 2013 at 7:14 pm

    I would have been scared if that had happened to me. I wonder why he asked if there was meat on the sandwich. Is there another back room for meet eaters?
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  • Reply
    Amy@Souldipper
    May 8, 2013 at 10:08 pm

    So…it was that little sniffing ****! He screwed up our email notifications. I’m not getting yours either. What’s goin’ on. I’ll try re-subscribing to you. Only thing I know to do, actually.

    I feel as though I’ve been in some cyber lock down, but I thought it was because I’ve been so busy that I haven’t been around to read folks. But man-o-man – I want to be notified of yours!

    If you have an avacado sandwich in your computer, get rid of it now, Kimmers!! 😀
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    • Reply
      Kim Sisto-Robinson
      May 11, 2013 at 6:58 am

      Amy,
      I shall subscribe to you again, dear. Xx I’ve missed you.

  • Reply
    Liz
    May 9, 2013 at 4:44 am

    I just embarrassed my family by taking a photo of the customs puppy with my iphone…then being chewed out by the officials. I can see me getting caught with a half sandwich, too 🙂 xo

    • Reply
      Kim Sisto-Robinson
      May 11, 2013 at 6:59 am

      HaaaaaHAaaaaa.
      you funny! X

  • Reply
    Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella
    May 10, 2013 at 1:06 am

    Oh Kim you make me laugh! And if you ever come to Australia and I hope you do, they’re very strict there! People often get in trouble for saving the fruit from the flight too. And hehe wouldn’t it be funny if you opened up your suitcase and you had a suitcase full of avocado and bologna sandwiches :Pxxx
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    • Reply
      Kim Sisto-Robinson
      May 11, 2013 at 7:00 am

      Lorraine,
      I hope to come to Australia so you can sign your book personally to me, dear. Xxx

  • Reply
    countingducks
    May 11, 2013 at 6:37 am

    You made me laugh and smile. But I cannot get over the loss of that sandwich. That’s a real shame. Nice to see you all got safely home though.
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    • Reply
      Kim Sisto-Robinson
      May 11, 2013 at 7:00 am

      Peter,
      we got home, laid down our suitcases and all went strait to bed!

      One can only have so much fun.

      Nice meeting you, dear. Xxx

  • Reply
    reneejohnsonwrites
    May 11, 2013 at 4:24 pm

    I don’t remember avocado being on the list of banned substances. Geez. Now you’ll have to eat the rubbery sandwich plate on the plane. Glad it wasn’t a corned beef and hash. OK – enough with the jokes. I can’t wait to hear what else you got into.
    reneejohnsonwrites recently posted..Why Words MatterMy Profile

  • Reply
    Dawn
    May 11, 2013 at 5:45 pm

    Pumpkin bread at Union Station in DC.

  • Reply
    Dawn
    May 11, 2013 at 5:45 pm

    Oh. Forgot…also a banana in my purse while going through security to get into the Capitol. Sigh. I am an idiot. Apparently.
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  • Reply
    Amy Tong
    May 11, 2013 at 10:17 pm

    Really? All that trouble and embarrassment just because of 1/2 an avocado sandwich? I would probably snatch it back from the officer and finish up my sandwich right in front of him! hahahah….but hope that at least you had a nice flight and fun trip. 😛
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  • Reply
    Barbara @ Barbara Bakes
    May 12, 2013 at 4:58 am

    LOL – sorry they made it stressful for you. We had a bike chain and lock confiscated at the Paris airport. We brought it to lock up our luggage on the train while traveling through Italy, but apparently it was a dangerous weapon.
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  • Reply
    Stacy Uncorked
    May 14, 2013 at 10:45 am

    That is HILARIOUS! Well, probably not so much at the time… 😉 Who knew a doggy would be jonesin’ for half a avocado sandwich? My dogs would have turned their noses up at such a thing. 😉 And the moral of your story? Priceless. 🙂
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  • Reply
    TheKitchenLioness
    May 15, 2013 at 12:16 am

    This is indeed a very funny story about a very funny incident at Gatwick Airport – I remember that one of the teddy bears that the kids brought along on our trip was x-rayed rather carefully by the Bristih airport security personnel because the person behind us was joking that perhaps we were “hiding” s.th. inside the teddy bear.

  • Reply
    Noeleen
    May 18, 2013 at 2:50 pm

    Customs freaks me like you wouldn’t believe – it’s the being assessed, others making judgments and believing whatever they do because of whatever they see, the being powerless, being manhandled possibly. Really does freak me.

    Glad you survived the sandwich incident. WOW! I would have been busted by nerves.
    Noeleen recently posted..Tracy in The DarkMy Profile

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      May 26, 2013 at 5:44 pm

      Noleen,
      the thing that bugged me the most was my family being annoyed w/ me.

      Bunch of Jerks! Xx
      My Inner Chick recently posted..Once Upon A Time…My Profile

  • Reply
    Sandra
    May 21, 2013 at 2:53 pm

    I would gladly bake you a cake with a file in it if you ever need one!

  • Reply
    Elephant's Child
    May 21, 2013 at 11:20 pm

    One of our cats hated us going away and ‘defiled the suitcases any time she could’. I had visions of a sniffer dog FASCINATED by eau de cat piddle and one or other of us being dragged away. It hasn’t happened – but it always worried me.
    Elephant’s Child recently posted..SkywhaleMy Profile

    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      May 26, 2013 at 5:45 pm

      Dear S.
      yes, this sounds like something my cat, Little Bastard, would do. Perhaps this stink was on my suitcase, as well!

      Xxx LOVE.
      My Inner Chick recently posted..Once Upon A Time…My Profile

  • Reply
    Desire Empire
    May 24, 2013 at 4:05 pm

    Who would have thought a vegetarian dog would cause you so much grief. Loved the way you wrote about it.
    Carolyn
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  • Reply
    ed p
    May 25, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    the stupid stuff done in the name of security…
    so great to see you again:)

  • Reply
    Ms. CrankyPants
    May 27, 2013 at 7:21 am

    Yes. Yes, I have. But MUCH worse. The Most Embarrassing Incident of My Life (TMEIOML) was on a cruise ship. I was with my parents. No, that’s not the embarrassing part. I was in a cabin by myself (this is important to the story). I had to, er, use the facilities and SOMEHOW the toilet clogged. Horrors. It simply would not flush, and the water began rising alarmingly high. Nearby was a toilet brush. I began trying to force the wads of toilet paper and business down the hole. No dice. If you’ve ever been on a cruise ship, you probably know you have a room attendant assigned especially for you. You know, if you need a new towel or something. You see him/her EVERY DAY. I could not stomach the idea of calling this nice young man to attend to this horrifying bit of business. Now I had a clogged toilet and a toilet brush that was, er, most soiled. Horrors. No one else sharing my room I might blame this on. SHIT SHIT SHIT. I looked around frantically. Where could I hide the brush at least? I had reached the conclusion that there was nothing to be done for the clog. I was actually wrapping the brush in plastic bags and going to toss it overboard when I came to my senses and realized that things would get exponentially worse when I was caught with the filthy brush, skulking across the Lido Deck toward the ship’s rail, ready to dispose of my cargo. I left the brush in the bathroom, called the room attendant, and fled. I had to see him for 5 more days. He was slightly less cheery upon seeing me after that. On my last day, I left him a nice tip and an apology note. Definitely TMEIOML.
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    • Reply
      My Inner Chick
      May 27, 2013 at 7:27 am

      Absoooooooooolutely FAaaaaaaaaaabulous.

      Guess what? Depending on your age, Cranky, I may have been working on that ship. I worked for Carnival for 4 years.

      Haaa.

      X
      My Inner Chick recently posted..Once Upon A Time…My Profile

  • Reply
    Pamela @ Brooklyn Farm Girl
    June 10, 2013 at 9:06 am

    Awww, sorry to hear about that sandwich! 🙁

    When flying to London last year we had a issue and they stopped us to search… our 2 stuffed animals, frogs. After many pat downs and worry they were going to be cut open, they let us go on our way with our stuffies!
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