The Chick Stands Too Close
–I’m acquainted with this chick…
who is termed ( if you watch Seinfeld ) as a “close talker.”
And although I attempt to reverse while she’s speaking, she
follows me until I
sense the heat of her essence upon my cheek…
—smell her last cup of coffee upon her breath…
—hear her heartbeat.
((( Thump. Thump.
I’m not shittin’ you.
“Did you here what so
and so did? What a dirty bastard.”
The wee hairs of her eyebrows nearly touch my eyebrows.
And I’m thinking, do
you really need to stand so intimately,
so familiarly, so snugly to tell me that?
Do you really need to rub your boobies into the proximity of my boobies?
Do you really need to brush your hips into the vicinity of my
If you come any closer, man, we’ll be making out.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
The thing is, I dig
her. She’s interesting. She’s amusing.
But she has this one itsy bitsy problem.
She has NO bubble ( as we continually tell our students in elementary
“This is your bubble,”
We declare. “This is your personal
space. Be careful about violating
somebody else’s space .”
Apparently, she never
received the memo.
–Dearest Reader, what
makes you a bit uncomfortable? Are you acquainted any