–You know what gets on my N::E::R::V::E::S………
- When you live with 3 stinky males who apparently don’t have the manners to put the toilet seat down. Thus, in the shadows, mama’s ass hits the cold water.
- When your two tabby cats stay outside all day in the woods only to come inside to take a big dump
- When Snooki is autographing her irrelevant book at Barnes & Noble and you only receive a rejection letter from the editor of the PTA News. What’s up with that?
Gag. Puke. Gag.
- When a woman of 70 years old looks like this: WTF?
Shuuuut Your big fat Mouth!
- When Kim Kardashian’s wedding gets more media attention than the Middle East (you Really bug me, Kim!)
- When people give you the bird who have the “I Love Jesus” bumper sticker stuck to their bumper
- When the super model bitch at Victoria Secret directs you to the Plus Size Lingerie
- When you can braid the hair under your arm pits after 2 days
- When your eye doctor’s last name is Mann, but he looks as if he’s still in middle school
- When individuals in the blogging world say the stupid word “Woot!” (LOLA?)
- When you walk in the living room naked & your hubs says “Can you wait until they score a goal, hon?”
- When you go for your appointment and Doc tells you, while shaking her head disgustingly, that you’ve gained twenty pounds, but only one pound is baby.
- When you drink too many glasses of Merlot and need to call everybody the next day to say you’re sorry (just in case)
- When your son, the one you were in labor with for 16 strait HOURS, De-friends you from Facebook and calls you a ‘Creeper’
It’s Not True! It’s not true!
- When you bring your hip clothes to a consignment store and the clerk refuses to take them because she assumes they’re vintage
- When the bag boy at the grocery store calls you Ma’am. (okay, I am old enough to be his mom, but that’s not the point) :::::SIGH:::::
- When you go to your high school reunion and your classmates look like your old math teachers
- When you comment on a blog and you type in the wrong “Too Two To.” But it’s 2 late; they already assume you’re a dumb ass
- When you look in the mirror and quite suddenly grew a mustache
- When that same mustache must’ve been the reason you were asked to dance at 5th Avenue (by 2 chicks)
- When your craving of chocolate is so intense that you eat the Hershey’s powdered drink mix
- When nobody else in the house appreciates the Madonna CD you play full blast while you’re vacuuming, mopping the floor, & making breakfast
—Dear Readers, what gets on your nerves. No. You cannot say ME!