(for my daddy whom inpires me, loves me, & accepts me
~~God shall wipe all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
“If you still feel like this in six months, you’ll need additional help, a psychiatric doctor, some sort of medication.”
Dr. Stink tells me this just after my sister was shot in the head three times, just after we planned a funeral, just after we picked out a casket.
…just after darkness fell upon my universe like a dark
dark darkdarkdardblackblackugly water.
“Six months?” I say, “Really?”
“Yeah, I find that most people feel better after about six months.”
Well I’m not most people,
Dr. Stink stares at me with blinky beady eyes that hurt.
“What do you want?” He finally asks.
“My life the way it was.” I say.
“You can’t have that. You’re sister isn’t coming back.”
OMG, You must be a
damn fucking genius. Hand me the plaque of your PhD so I can thump you over the head with it.
“You have to face reality, Kim. The reality is that your sister is GONE.”
I hate you. I hate you. I’d like to strangle you this minute on that ugly oriental rug.
“Imagine what your sister would want. Why don’t you write her a letter?”
How many other patients have you said this to, Asswipe? Why don’t you just grab your text book on– “Articulating With A Woman Who Is On The Verge Of Madness?”
“One couple came to see me whose son committed suicide. They had a ceremony and burned the gun he shot himself with in their fire pit.”
What the hell does that have to do with me, my life, my mourning? Why the hell would I want to see the gun that made my sister’s heart stop? Made my heart stop? Broke our family into a million little pieces?
Dr. Stink, the best way to describe you is: Stink. Stank. Stunk.
He stunk so bad that I still smell his apathy & indifference.
And I already passed the six month marker that Dr. Stink talked about.
It’s now been 11 months & 21 days since my sister’s ex-husband shot shot shot her
It’s been an eternity.
It’s been a split second in time.
It’s been triple hell on earth.
But I’m still standing
Six months. One year. Five years. Fifty years.
My Sister was murdered by Mike Peterson on May26, 2010. When her heart stopped….My heart stopped.
Kay & Saint Shirley (mom)
~Read More About Kay Here: In Memory of Kay
~~~For support and more information please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or at TTY 1-800-787-3224.
click here NOW : http://www.thehotline.org/get-help/help-in-your-area/
~~~~~Pre-Register Here for Kay’s Walk For Domestic Violence on Sunday–May 22, 2011: http://www.theduluthmodel.org/events.php