December 19, 2010
1. Because last time you signed on facebook, she IM’s you from work and tells you to get your ass outside to mow the lawn
2. Because she asks annoyingly why your friend, Dane, addresses you with… “Waz up, Bitch?”
3. Because she pokes you with red hearts and hugs
4. Because it’s embarrassing when her status screams “Cougars Rock, Babe!”
5. Because she keeps friending your damn High School Teachers
6. Because after stalking your home page, she asks you what the bloody hell a bong is
7. Because she continues suggesting friends for you that are over 35-years-old… including Pastor Mark, the woman who cuts your hair , and Aunt Bonnie
8. Because after creeping on your photo albums, she makes a comment like, “Ohhhhhh, Cute photo of you and Jeffry at the Homecoming Game. Remember when you kids used to hold hands and kiss in Pre-School?
9. Because she reminds you a month ahead of time when her birthday is by sending you those stupid little cakes
10. Because she asks your girlfriends’ to friend her…. and then digs like hell for information about every. single. detail of your life.
SO NOT COOL, MOM!